"No is a No" and what about your silence, Bachaanji?

Dear Bachhanji,

I wouldn’t have written this letter but for your comments... Strangely as they irked me, there was something inside me strangling to talk to you.

The recent rape incidents in Kathua and the one in Uttar Pradesh have fuelled in all of us a riot of emotions ranging from horror, disgust, depression, outrage, anger and your comment affirms that unlike many other thick skinned devils who justified the brutal rape and murder, there is a celebrity ‘dadaji’ full of sympathy and compassion. You are a celebrity, one of the biggest India has ever seen and you know well the ‘dos and donts’ of life of a celebrity; I am a nacheez to make you aware of one of the dos and of the burden of your responsibility that lies on your strong shoulders, today, in the times when violence has been normalized. People are killed for their religion, their castes, for marrying in to other communities. Crimes, rapes and other horrendous incidents are being used for political gains and for stoking communal hatred, be it of religion, ethnicities or caste. We are learning to live these incidents as if they are a part of daily life because apart from being horrified and disgusted, what else can a common man who works from 9 am to 7 pm do for such cases. Instances of unprecedented violence are far too numerous to register individually a protest against and I will not elaborate on those incidents of violence here.   

For many of us in India, and by us, I am talking particularly about the so-called middle class that I belong to, our families nurture values of sincerity, obedience, modesty, dedication towards work, taking care of one’s family and treating our neighbours and guests as one’s own family members. The general outlook of a ‘normal’ family, - which is also seen in the elite classes or their counter parts from the weaker sections of Indian society, is that politics should be kept away from our personal lives. That politics could be idealist, that it could be based on certain principles or moral values is hardly ever imagined and/or accepted. Our families perceive it as bad, only for the corrupt, always done for one’s gains and interests. Anything to do with politics is better left to ‘them’ – the politicians or the rich and the well connected. Coming from a background that has had good family connections with political parties, you are well aware of the reality that politics is something that touches our lives whether we are concerned about it or not. Unlike my mother who asks me to switch off the TV when gory images of the battered body of Ashifa are shown, for she feels that this disturbs the mental peace and the good vibes in our home, you know very well that the brutal rape and murder of an eight year old is haunting us all. Unsettling images of Ashifa have been inscribed in our memory, the chilling rape and murder has already devastated us, it has disturbed the inner peace we always felt in our family and in our homes.  

Your aura is that of a swacch, huge tide wiping clean the shores and it is at this opportune moment that you have to listen to your conscience and act accordingly. I very sincerely feel that you must use your tidal powers and this is the moment for you to act. This particular incident is unique in ways it unfolded, and is still unfolding. Rather than refraining from commenting, do seize this opportunity to speak loud and clear, (- just as you acted and emphatically said in the movie Pink, “A NO is a NO”), of what needs to be done, of a fair and fast trial assuring justice for the departed one who will never see the meadows she was so fond of. In response to a question, you said, “uss vishay ko uchhalo mat” - your comments smell of repugnance and horror, I am certain of that and it is precisely for this reason that in my opinion, you must rethink considering a stance for campaign(s) you have been endorsing till now. Sir, these times are begging you to act, else no matter how much respect, satisfaction of being a brand ambassador for campaigns or happiness you get from any action done for your nation, no matter the popularity or riches you earn, your grand children will remember you as someone who didn’t voice his opinion at a time when it needed the most.

Regards,

Yours wannabe fan

Letter to Ashifa

Dear Ashifa,

My college, a college reserved only for Women is celebrating its annual day and I see all my students all decked up for this most awaited event of the year. There is perfume in the air, good music has set the tone of the moment and festivities and animations are in full swing; the swaying young girls and faculties already feeling the plunge of this bonaza of the year. While all of us are lost in wonderful, unforgettable moments, I feel completely ill at ease, furious, outraged and completely at loss of words over a face book post that informs me of rape of a 8 year old Asifa in the faraway land of J & K. The gory details of the rape have taken over me and it’s nauseating to think about the torture the 8 year old must have suffered. My hands tremble of what to write and confused, a heady mix of thoughts, almost akin to loss of capability of stringing any thoughts together frustrate me like never before.

I feel utterly helpless and I feel like crying, my hands tremble and I feel guilty. Guilty of something I have not done, guilty of inaction, guilty of not being able to channelize my outrage and sharing it with others. Feeling defeated, my head bowed down in shame, disgust, guilt and drown by emotion, I take to Facebook and commit the act that has become the in-thing of our times. I scroll down, through the post where I read the details of the heinous crime and share it with my friends on Facebook. I feel utterly ashamed that all I can do for the moment is share this post and make people know of what happened to this innocent girl…

Ashifa, I do not believe in God anymore and yet I pray to the nameless Almighty for justice to be given you, your friends, relatives and all those who feel outraged by this act. I proudly (and somewhat hypocritically) say that All Indians are my brothers and sisters and even if Ashifa, if you had not been Indian, I wish no person endures what you went through during those moments when you were kept alive to be raped again, and again at yet again, before the last time. I am ashamed that this is happening in our country where we proudly affirm that we give respect to women and elderly. Asifa, we have betrayed you, not as Indians but more so as humans, we have betrayed your being irrespective of your religion, faith, age and what not parameters on which our identities are fashioned on. Asifa, when I read what you went through, I wish I could become violent and perpetuate the most gruesome tortures to those who ‘enjoyed’ you.

I really don’t know what this writing is going to do. I am sure some people are going to read your event, your rape in a completely different light and may attribute something that you are not even aware of – you are going to be seen as merely being a minority, or your belonging to your state. I don’t know but it may also happen that this whole rape thing is going be to given a communal colour to it, may to be to an extent of getting a political mileage out of it for parties across the spectrum, I really don’t know and I am all the more distressed over such an happening before it takes place. I used to be an optimist but that doesn’t seem to be the case anymore.

Finally Asifa, I am sorry, for there seems an absence of ‘collective guilt’ in all my friends and relatives and all the so-called middle classes and the aspirational upper middles classes of being concerned about the 7 pay commission, immobile properties, the latest cars and their new models, their trips abroad, the weekend parties and what not… I will not write about all that as there is not end to it. I feel extremely disgusted at our attitudes of thinking of things that we are only immediately concerned about. This kind of thick skinned attitude and absence of any interest of anything that happens beyond our immediate entourage and environment leaves me utterly disgusted. I just wonder how the thick skinned attitude people would react had Asifa been there daughter. I wish them nightmares that would make them little more sensitive towards our remote worlds in order to bring them back to their senses and to their strayed humanity.